9/30/2008

Listening to Your Inner Voice

Sometimes one of the hardest things to do is to listen to your inner voice. You know that voice, the one that tells you if something is a good idea or not. Unfortunately, sometimes our heads or our egos get in the way of the listening to that little voice...

How many times have you thought - if I had just listened to that little voice instead of thinking too much or just pushing through? Like taking "one last run" on a ski day only to get hurt? Or just having a bad feeling about something, but doing it anyway only leading to mishaps?

Several years ago I came face to face with the consequence of not listening to that little voice. I was on vacation with a couple of girlfriends in Maui and two of us decided to wake up early the first morning go swimming with wild dolphins.

We were excited when we got to the local beach early and spotted several dolphins out past the waves. What we also noticed was the size of the waves - they were huge. At the waters edge, I said I was not going in and my friend kind of looked at me shocked. I had heard that little voice telling me to stay on the beach, but then I did a funny thing - I went in anyway.

Not ten feet out, I knew I was in trouble. I was being sucked down by the undertow. I couldn't stay up, one wave after another pushed me down and all I could think was, "Kelly, this is so stupid. You knew not to go into the water and your Irish got you into this. You have two beautiful children at home and this is your choice?" Needless to say I was pissed at myself, swearing at my stupidity and then the survivor stepped in.

I saw a large rock over to my left and I knew if I got there I could at least catch my breath and decide how to get back to shore. Somehow I got to the rock and clung. Over and over I keep thinking about God and the hymnal words, "clinging to the rock." I smiled and knew it was going to be alright - I was clinging to my rock, my God. I caught my breath and managed somehow to dash myself against the rocks at the water's edge. Thus I made it to shore, be it battered, bleeding and shaken.

When I finally made it out of the water, a healer I did not know happened to be on shore waiting for me and my oh my, the scolding I received! I didn't even say a word and in she started, "Kelly, what are you doing? You have work to do here - people need you. You heard the voice, now you have to listen better. What are you thinking? You know you have important work to do..." On and on she lectured until she knew I was properly chastised. Then she had me smelling flowers and walking barefoot to try to get back into my body. It worked and I never saw her again after that day.

I was shaken that morning on the beach, and honestly I think still am, but in a good way. I listen better. I heard that voice years ago on the beach but I ignored it. I made a choice - yes, free will. We always, always have choices that can either lift ourselves up or push ourselves down. We decide over and over every day.

Interestingly, I think I made the right decision to go into the water that day. The lessons I learned from that experience were profound and have always stayed with me - for the better. It was terrifying and life-affirming in the ocean. I learned to trust my inner voice. It had been there all along, guiding me, but I chose not to listen. Now, I choose to listen.

Kelly Ballard is a workshop leader, Intuitive Guide and Healer. Through workshops, private sessions and guided meditations Kelly specializes in helping others discover positive solutions for immediate change/growth in their lives thus drawing their most abundant life into reality. Find out more information about her services and meditation CDs at http://www.kellyballard.com - Contact her directly at 720-984-4232 or email kelly@kellyballard.com - She lives in Boulder, CO.